Temper tantrum

Posted by on Aug 22, 2012 in Baby Talk | 10 comments

Wesley and I went to lunch with Chris’ family today for my FIL’s birthday, Happy Birthday PawPaw , and it went sour fast! Wes started off in a good mood and ate fairly well. It wasn’t until it was time for me to eat did he start to fuss. We ate at a Mongolian BBQ place so my BIL watched him as I went up to get a plate. When I got back he began throwing his food, screaming, and crying. No one finds this cute or funny especially me, so you can imagine my horror. I tried to distract, feed, guide, and calm him. Nope, he just wanted to run around. We happened to be in the corner and had it to ourselves so I moved the highchair to block his escape and let him roam on the floor in between our table and the wall. He then wanted to eat all the food he had thrown on the ground. At this point I wanted to pull my hair out. My littlest SIL got on the floor with him and tried to keep him busy while I attempted to eat but he just wanted to scream and cry. After a few minutes of trying to appease Wesley, I just waved the white flag and asked for a box. After cleaning the floor and the table I picked him up and left. I was embarrassed and hungry. It sucked leaving early but his tantrum was getting worse and other patrons, including family, didn’t deserve to hear or see it.

So there it is, I’ve (un)successfully? dealt with my first temper tantrum. I don’t know if what I did was correct but it’s at least over and done with. I also don’t know what to do if this happens again. What is an appropriate discipline for a 13month old? Is he even old enough for discipline yet?

10 Comments

  1. When Isla can’t make it through a meal at a restaurant, we pack up and leave. My husband or I will take her out to the car, while the other one gets the food boxed up and pays the check. I’d say for 13 months, the best thing you can do is remove him from the situation and respond unemotionally to the tantrum. It’s not really his fault. He’s just little and that required more patience than he has! Keep working on table manners and how to sit down through a meal at home. He’ll get there eventually. :)

    • Thank you! I do think that is the best thing to do in this situation especially for his age! It isn’t always ideal, timing wise, but I’d teach him how to act in public than finish my meal while everyone suffers.

  2. You can’t really discipline a 13 month old. The best thing you can do is to remove the child from the situation and not pay a whole lot of attention to the behaviour. They are not doing it because they are trying to be “bad” at that age. I think you did everything right.

    • That’s a great mantra to remember when a tantrum is forming; he’s not doing it to be bad. Thanks mama!

  3. Yeah I remember those days and still have those days from time to time. I just make sure if we are eating out he has had a good nap and had his fun so. It is a hard age to deal with cause they don’t understand why they can’t behave that way yet. It’ll get easier. I would suggest starting at home and having him sit with you guys at dinner and try to keep him in his chair till everyone is done. Thats what we do. As for when he becomes uncontrollable just remove him from the situation and try to talk to him and explain that the behavior isn’t appropriate even tho he’s lil they understand way more than we realize. I still do this with Xander. It’ll get better. Hard to keep an active toddler from going in 20 different directions at once. I can’t take my lil one to the mall even for 20 minutes without it being a battle. Oh the trials of being a parent. You’ll look back on it one day and find the whole thing funny. Enjoy him while you can cause one day you’ll find yourself missing the chaos.

    • Oh honey…you did everything right. It was a chance for a lesson and you taught one. Discipline is possible at this age, discipline is just not the same as punishment, which a lot of young parents tend to think of interchangeably. You took him out of the situation. You did not tolerate his behavior. Was that exactly what he wanted, maybe. Did it suck for you? I’m sure. But, repetitively doing that, will probably only take a few times, and he’ll learn. Sometimes he will want to stay, and won’t get his way unless he does behave properly. You are a great mom, although I’m sure a hungry one. I’ve had to do that several times with each kid when they were that age. When they get older, they will say and do hurtful things. Thats when it really stinks, cuz you now they know. Josh once told me in Walmart that I was mean and he wanted a new mommie. I pointed out a couple of random ladies and told him they looked nice, and asked if he wanted them. He got a really strange look on his face but never said it again, ever. Did I handle it correctly, probably not. I probably should have said that I loved him abyway, no matter what. but, you do what you gotta do in the moment! You will both survive!!

  4. you did everything right mama:) i just immediately pack up and ignore the behavior. it gets better dont worry!

  5. You did everything right!! He will learn that tantrums are not appropriate and that when he acts that way he doesn’t get to stay and have fun with everyone else. It definitely stinks as a mama, you feel like you miss our on everything but eventually you won’t have to do that anymore or they will be spaced a lot further out. Keep your head high :)

  6. I have to agree with the others: it’s age appropriate. Heck, even with my two and a half year old, there are times that we just load up and go. I’m not in the mood to torture everyone else trying to eat a meal to create a teachable moment.

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